I'm getting old and I confuse

The increasing number of age is scary thing for me and many of people out there and I keep think and thinking about it so many times. I’m 22 now and I don’t have a good job, even a degree that really important for us getting a job. And that is the biggest problem for me because without degree the employers don’t even look at the resume. For them, degree is just the basic of getting job even the experience is important but the experience cannot be gain without degree. It is the fact. I suppose to further my study 1 and half a year ago but the chance is not for me and I'm still waiting for good news about my application status. I have no idea for god sake what had been planned for me. I tried many things. I tried to be a good student but I failed, then I tried to seek a good and suitable job that can fit me well but then I just got no idea. I’m really confused what I gotta do in my life to be successful person, the fate just ain’t right for me. And now I’m still trying to be the best among the worst. And now I just hope that I can enter a public university and top of that I'm still looking a right job for me.

Bruno Mars - Count On Me (I wish I have a good friend)

If you ever find yourself stuck in the middle of the sea
I'll sail the world to find you
If you ever find yourself lost in the dark and you can't see
I'll be the light to guide you

Find out what we're made of
When we are called to help our friends in need

You can count on me like 1, 2, 3
I'll be there
And I know when I need it
I can count on you like 4, 3, 2
And you'll be there
'cause that's what friends are supposed to do oh yeah

If you're tossin' and you're turnin
and you just can't fall asleep
I'll sing a song beside you
And if you ever forget how much you really mean to me
Every day I will remind you

Find out what we're made of
When we are called to help our friends in need

You'll always have my shoulder when you cry
I'll never let go
Never say goodbye

You can count on me 'cause I can count on you

While I’m writing this entry, I keep listening to this song and I find it warm. I mean its touch my heart. I’m a sensitive person personally when it comes to feeling but actually I choose not to care about that feel. I have no time for that and I don’t even have a good friend, someone to share something goods, smile, laugh and cry together. I just don’t have that.

I started to have a good friend while I’m in high school, to be exact my last second year of high school I got friends after I moved to other school. I blessed. I’m happy. People start to know me. They accept me. I share many things with them. That’s when the hostel life begins. I start to know what is life, what are friends all about, how to know people, making connection with surrounded and may things. I even lost my good friend because of something stupid and I wish I could see him again, greet him and I don’t wish the relationship as good as before, enough just get to know back to each other, still keep in contact and just that’s it.

Now, I’m too busy to think about having a good friend in real life. The world is very demanding that would make us want to grab all the chances even I have to seek for that. Push away a good life is better rather pushing away the dream. Means relationship don’t even matter to success, that would come later after the success is achieved. And after I tired of these world things I wish I can find a very good friend. There would be someday.